Clooney Tofu? Justice Dept. Investigating...Justice?

Just when I thought the PETA crazies couldn't get any crazier (suggesting Ben and Jerry's use women's breast milk and that fish be called "sea kittens"), they want to make George Clooney-flavored tofu. Now how do they plan on doing this? By taking the sweat from his gym towel. The president of PETA said, "I thought, What would make tofu more attractive to people?... I see people having parties to try CloFu." Next on PETA's list of tofu flavors? Obamasweat! 

Now here's the big one:

The Department of Justice will be investigating Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio on allegations from none other than liberal activists that the Maricopa County Sheriff Office has "violated the civil rights of illegal aliens."  Something about that statement perplexes me - "civil rights of illegal aliens." Since when do illegal aliens have civil rights? Doesn't the DOJ have any real crimes to investigate? In 18 months, 16,000 detainees were deemed illegal aliens. He must be doing something right. That 16,000 represents 1/3 of all U.S. inmates who have been placed on hold because they've also been identified as illegal aliens. That's 48,000 illegal aliens who have been arrested because they have committed crimes. They are obviously not benefiting society and therefore should be sent back to their oh-so-beloved country.  They're illegal - send them back. It's the law.